I knew exactly what I wanted to wear for my birthday.

ERMAGHERRRDDDDDDD TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!! AND I’M GONNA EAT SO MUCH GLUTEN FREE CAKE TONIGHT!!!! It feels like I just had my last birthday like a month ago. Time FLIES living in New York City. Anyways, I wish myself a wonderful birthday today. And since I’m awesome, here’s even MORE…

More like House of HAIRology!!! Seriously my mane is OUT OF CONTROL. It’s like wearing a shawl. Which is why I’m wearing thigh highs in January. I’m hot from the shoulders up so I have to let my legs cool off. It’s getting so long that I’m starting to wake…

This was such a dark day. I smashed my thumb in a window that morning, so I wore all black for the impending loss of my fingernail. I may be smiling, but inside I’m screaming in agony. Well, maybe not screaming… In case you can’t tell…I’m in a parking garage….

What length is longer than Matronly? Hasidic? That’s the length of skirt I wear… Although, in the summer I wear Slut Shorts, so I guess it evens out. Photo : PBG Follow Hotpants INSTAGRAM / TWITTER / BLOGLOVIN / FACEBOOK