I always dreamed of being perfect. The perfect daughter, the perfect woman, the perfect person for whoever was in front of me. I didn’t realize for a long time, that the only person who mattered in the equation was me- and I was destroying her…
I always dreamed of being perfect. The perfect daughter, the perfect woman, the perfect person for whoever was in front of me. I didn’t realize for a long time, that the only person who mattered in the equation was me- and I was destroying her…
If my body could tell a story, what would it say? Well for the next few minutes, I’m allowing my body to have the floor. 10 minutes ago Bethany was standing in front of a mirror staring at me. She was tilting her heads in all kinds of uncomfortable ways, trying to find an angle of me that she liked best. She has done this for most of our life…
I don’t really know what age I started becoming obsessed with my body. I remember being in 3rd or 4th grade and my peers started making comments that I was fat and ugly. I started dieting shortly after that. I began to lose weight and then quickly regain it back. It started with dieting, and then binging, and then someone in my life told me it’s ok to make yourself throw up sometimes…
Sometimes I avoid watching my shadow when I walk so I can’t see how obvious my limp is. It’s probably the one thing about being an amputee that still makes me self conscious because it’s so glaringly obvious something is different about me even when I’m wearing pants or a long skirt and you can’t see my prosthesis…
I think it was around the time I had 11 years old that my feet started to look funny. At the time, I was taking homeopathic treatments for bad allergies and I thought all those vials may have had something to do with the shrinking of my toes. All other toes kept growing normal, except for the 4th toe in both of my feet. It’s not like my feet looked like a Sally Hansen’s commercial before but now…