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Last weekend I hung out with Melodie Jeng and she shot these beautiful natural light portraits of me at her apartment.

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It’s a little bittersweet for me because now that I’m not using Photoshop to edit my skin anymore, I have to accept every photo for what it is, and looking at these I realize just how imperfect my skin is and will always be.

But trying to embrace these photos is helping me on my path towards self acceptance.

This is EXACTLY what I looked like at this EXACT moment in time and there’s nothing I could have done otherwise.

I think Melodie beautifully captured me.

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She wanted the photos to be serious. When I smiled she told me to stop smiling, which only made me smile more.

It’s like telling a kid not to push the red button.

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I was really hungry. I’m probably staring longingly at the Starbucks across the street.

(because to me, a Starbucks decaf vanilla soy latte = food)

OM NOM NOM NOM NOM

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Anyways,  I hope you all have a magical Halloween tonight.

I absolutely hate Halloween because I usually end up at some crappy party dressed like a fool when I’d rather just be in bed eating Starbucks.

Be safe tonight, love yourselves, be kind to yourselves, and eat SO MUCH CANDY!

HOTPANTS LOVES YOU!

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LATER DUDES,

XX-HOTPANTS